EXISTENTIAL CRISIS

" I've been having a hard time adjusting, I had the shiniest wheels now they're rusting."

"Could've followed my fears all the way down. And maybe I don't quite know what to say."

"They said all of my cages were mental, so I got wasted like all my   potential" 

-This is me trying

(Taylor Swift)

WHAT IS AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS? WHAT DOES IT DO TO YOU? HOW DOES IT OCCUR?

HOW DO YOU BREAK FREE FROM IT? WHAT DOES IT TEACH YOU?

(TRIGGER WARNING⚠: THIS IS GONNA BE ROUGH)

:')

Image: Pinterest

• WHAT DOES EXISTENTIAL CRISIS MEAN?

In the most uncomplicated yet bitterly true words ever,

 innumerable thoughts and questions race through your mind the prominent ones being,

Why am I alive?

What is my purpose in life?

Even if I know my purpose, what if I fail to accomplish it?

Would things be different if I wasn't here?

Just...WHY!?

Everything feels trivial. You don't know anything that's happening around you. You are caught up with feelings of anxiety, worries, trauma, haze, desperation, and dismay all at once! It's mind-boggling. You're battling with your inner self inside your mind but from the outside...you're blank; your face is perplexed and is wondering which emotion to display.

It feels as though you are not even genuinely alive...but are existing simply cause there's oxygen around you and cause there are people who care about you. For real, at one point you stop living for yourself, you're living -existing for others. You develop a void inside your mind, body, and soul. Not sure if you ever wanna fill it.

You just wanna be alone all the time, yet you want someone to talk to. You're happy for your friend when something good happens with them but then you think, what did you do to not deserve that? You're worried. You are overwhelmed. ALL THE DAMN TIME. (Well, at least I am)

You start to question the meaning of life, as though if the essence is missing or was it never even there. Feeling of incompetence, distress wanting to make it better but not knowing what to do; let alone having the energy and/or willpower to do so.
Here, sleep becomes an escape. After you cross that phase, you sleep just because it's the nightfall and wake up just cause it's sunrise.
Can't be a disappointment to the sun at least, can we now?

 

• WHAT CAUSES EXISTENTIAL CRISIS?

You might think this is a sentiment that just comes and goes but no, it isn't. 

It can happen due to a lot of things happening in your life all at once. May it be an important exam, exasperation because of just everything? Not being satisfied with your decision-making skills :'). Constantly feeling that things are going out of your control or perhaps a personal feeling of losing a loved one. 

Nonetheless, these are some pretty serious causes that shouldn't be overlooked just because~

• WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU DURING AN "EXISTENTIAL CRISIS" AND HOW CAN YOU FIX IT.
  
  

SOCIAL ANXIETY. I cannot stress this point enough. In my existential crisis phase, the last thing I wanted to do was interact with anyone. It is always disconcerting to tell someone what you're going through and they look at you and hope that you're all right or worse judge you for feeling this way. Naturally, your first initial instinct would be to cut every person out of your life till you feel better. 

Well, don't do that. 
If someone is worried about you and is taking efforts to make you feel better, let them. You pushing them away is only gonna hurt them and you might even lose a perfectly good friend just cause you were upset. Sure, your own space is respected but that doesn't give you any right to be narcissistic. Instead, be polite and let them know that all you need is some time to be back to your content self. They will not only understand you but also help you combat this feeling. 

Another one is losing faith, hopes, and beliefs and even letting your morals down. Being skeptical of your own emotions and further complicating things for yourself as well as others. At this time the most critical thing is for you to be honest with yourself; face your fears, and let your guard down. Be vulnerable. Let the fear consume you once and for all. Drowning in the storm could make you feel truly alive.

Image: Pinterest

• WHAT THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND DURING THE AFTERMATH? 

This is how the universe works, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. 

You probably needed to detach yourself from everything just to rediscover your brand new and improved self. Getting back to all the fascinating things that bring a purpose to life. 

Everything happening to you was a singularity until one fine day you decided to break free. 

This is just a reminder for you to cherish and appreciate all the good things in life because tribulations are bound to happen. How you handle them is what makes you the person you are. 

Life is not about hiding from the storm, it is about dancing in the rain. 

Image: Pinterest

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